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Tale #107


It was a windy Wednesday in March when…

…an attorney called to inform me that my deposition would be the following Tuesday at 10 AM. I was disappointed when he told me it would be at his midtown office rather than in the large courtroom I had envisioned as I had been looking forward to playing a featured role in this real-life “Law and Order” episode. The show “opened” when instead of a “closing” my seller, Mr. X, had decided to sue the condominium and explained to me that due to the pending lawsuit my commission would be paid at a later date.

The drama had begun back in the summer of 2010 when Mr. X told me he, Mrs. X and their two daughters would be relocating from Greenwich and making Manhattan their primary residence. He felt his 2,000 sq. ft. pied-a-terre wasn’t large enough so he wanted me to sell it and find them something bigger. I had considered Mr. and Mrs. X to be friends so I did everything I could to try and achieve his unrealistic $10 Million asking price while simultaneously finding them a four bedroom on the Upper East Side and getting their girls into school since Mr. X didn’t believe me that the spots in the private schools were highly competitive. After finding a terrific cash buyer prepared to pay the asking price, his condo board denied the application and opted to exercise their right of first refusal. Although Mr. X got all of his money, he felt “played” by the Board and decided that instead of going back to his “day job”, he’d embark on suing the luxury condo as his full-time career.

The X family moved into a suite at the Carlyle Hotel and called it home for the first two years of lawsuits and trials. Even after losing each time and being fired by a bevy of attorneys, he’d find a new one and initiate yet another lawsuit. I couldn’t fathom how after years of paying exorbitant legal fees and hotel bills he didn’t decide to move on so I kept expecting him to give up the game of revolving court cases and pay me the commission I was due and had unfortunately spent in Buenos Aires prior to the closing.

The deposition fell on the day of the March blizzard when everything was closed so when I called the attorney’s office and he confirmed that it was still on, I braved the elements as I walked up 57th Street battling the fierce icy wind gusts and slippery sidewalks. I was determined not to turn back until I saw even Starbucks was closed but I forged ahead and was extremely grateful to arrive safely. The attorney said the other lawyer was on his way and it didn’t surprise me that Mr. X wouldn’t be making an appearance but intended to instead listen on the phone which was a relief as I didn’t know how I could be civil to this short litigious Republican who owed me so much money.

While we were waiting for Mr. X’s attorney to arrive my lawyer asked if I knew of any Classic 6’s in the East 60’s since his live-in Orthodox girlfriend and her identical twin were so close that the three of them went everywhere together. The good news is I’m showing them my listing on Fifth Avenue that happens to have two refrigerators, two dishwashers and is a three-minute walk to his office.

only on Wednesdays, only with Wendy